Round and Round She Goes….

English: Roller skating around 1905

Image via Wikipedia

This weekend my wife and I did something we haven’t done in a while.

We got funky.

We got wild.

We kicked it up a bit.

We…roller skated!

We literally hadn’t done this in some 20 years!

Now, some might wonder, “Gee, was it like riding a bicycle?”

Well, sure, if that bicycle had Wheels of Death  roller skates on its wheels.

Wheels of Death.

You think I jest, but it’s weird strapping wheels onto your feet and expecting anything to be “normal.” Counterintuitive. Asking for trouble. It’s worse than slapping boards on your feet and plummeting down a slippery slope of frozen water.

But, it’s fun!

Now, in all honesty, I did think I’d pick it back up again rather quickly.

Yeahhh…didn’t happen.

No…it took a little while to get acclimatized to the whole…thing. Fun, yes, but it didn’t come back as quickly as I’d imagined it would. Last I remembered, I’d picked it up rather quickly (which I do remember being wowed by, at the time, so it really must’ve happened…), and had been zooming around that rink 20 years ago like a semi-pro in near no time. This did not happen this time around. Of course, I could have been heavily romanticizing the past, too, but see parenthetical statement above.

In any event, flying around in circles, with all ages and abilities in what quite seemed like a Roller Derby kill zone was cool. As I watched those more experienced than I, I tried to remember, to emulate, the body motion, the technique. Once or twice I quite emulated a Looney Tune cartoon than an experienced roller skater. And, weird person that I am, as I’m doing all this, I’m also thinking Hey, this must be creating new neural pathways and renewed muscle memory, because it’s, essentially, new activity–something I haven’t done before, in that it’s been 20 years….

It was then I alternated between all four limbs flailing wildly about and my legs spreading wide into a into a Chinese split the hard way–an inflexible, flat surface also coming up right quick before me.

Okay, be focused and in the moment, and all, but keep the philosophical musings for non-life-threatening situations.

So, my wife and I skated around separately, because (in my own words) I told her “You don’t want to be linked to me, skating around here.” In true wifely fashion, she overruled me, grabbed my hands, and she (show off) skated backwards, as we skated in unison. Of course, my words did come back to haunt her, as, I think on our second pass, “something happened,” we lost our symmetry and what grace we momentarily revelled in, and she was quick to cut me loose. Couldn’t blame her. Was doing the same, myself.

Love only knows so much sacrifice, you know.

We continued our hour or so of skating, laughing and amazed at how much fun this was and why the heck hadn’t we done this more?, when the lights went up and our rink time was over. A little sore, quite excited, we left the rink. As we removed our Wheels of Death, we were both reliving the moments on the rink, hoping to do this again–sooner–some day. We went out to eat afterward, both admitting to not admitting how sore various parts of our anatomy were…but genuinely happy they were. It was our badge of honor. No pain, no gain, maaan.

BTW, neither of us fell.


About fpdorchak

Upmarket paranormal fiction author. I write gritty, Twilight Zone-like fiction. Please check out my website:! Thank you for stopping by!
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3 Responses to Round and Round She Goes….

  1. Karen Lin says:

    POV error:
    little sore, quite excited, we left the rink.
    Maybe she a little less sore than you?
    I remember having to adjust from the 4 wheels to the in-line skates. It created temporary terror and swept away the great/odd memories of skating to “Whoa Whoa Whoa, How do you like it? How do you like it?” and “That’s the way…unh hu unh hu…I like it…” with KC and the sunshine band spotlights flying across the hard hard deady rink.

  2. Adrienne says:

    Sounds like a blast and brought back fond memories of childhood skating parties and, after moving to Colorado Springs, of 9th grade when the “in thing” was going roller skating on Wednesday nights. Disco balI, flashing lights and yes, KC and the Sunshine Band blaring. Would love to attempt a spin around the rink. Will have to check out the opportunities here. Still want to try in-line skating, though I think I’d be a little steadier with the four strategically placed wheels as opposed all wheels in, well, a line.

    • fpdorchak says:


      Good to hear from you! Well, as I see it, WHEELS ON YOUR FEET are WHEELS ON YOUR FEET. :-] Admittedly, never tried inline (that I can remember, but I’ve forgotten more than I ever knew…), but am told it’s much like skating–which I’ve done, and find I can do. A little. Sore ankles. But, it was a lot of fun (uh, more updated tunage, but still the lights…)–go check it out! Be well!

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