Brian Regan – Stand-up Comic

Pikes Peak Center Playbill, Brian Regan (My Image ©2020 F. P. Dorchak)

Pikes Peak Center Playbill, Brian Regan (My Image ©2020 F. P. Dorchak)

Last night my wife and I went to the Pikes Peak Center’s performance of Brian Regan, and he was hilarious! His warm-up act was Joe Zimmerman, also another hilarious stand-up comic!  My wife had received the tickets for Christmas.

We’d been looking forward to seeing this guy ever since. I’d thought I’d seen him before, but, nope, hadn’t.

He kinda looks like Will Ferrell, doesn’t he?

Off we go to the Pikes Peak Center! It started snowing pretty good just before we left (this doesn’t add to anything, I’m just setting the stage so to speak…). New security standards had been put in place for this event, smaller handbags, blah x 3.

So, get this: as I’m standing directly in front of the body scanner emptying my pockets and chatting with security personnel, the danged scanner goes off! “Ha-ha,” I joke. “I’ve already set off the scanner and haven’t even gone through it yet!”

Were the security personnel amused? Not sure.

Anyway the one tells me I can go on through. I do. I set it off for realsies. I chuckle. Must be my belt buckle. I always have to strip going through airport scanners. It’s so embarrassing. For most onlookers. Anyway, the security person on the other side grabs her wand and approaches me.

“You have anything in your pockets?” she says, or are you just happy to see me, I finish mentally. Yeah, I don’t think then was the time to joke, given the above reaction. I do try to read my audience.

“Yeah,” I say.

Pikes Peak Center Stage (My Image ©2020 F. P. Dorchak)

Pikes Peak Center Stage (My Image ©2020 F. P. Dorchak)

My wife makes her way over to me, saying stuff that doesn’t register on me, because I’m already in conversation…and thinking. Hard. About more punchlines.

Security starts wanding me. “Anything metal”?

Her wand starts going off just as I pat myself down, and I say, “Nooo—”

When it dawns on me and and I begin to laugh.

“Sorry! I forgot,” I say, “I had a hip replacement!”

I’m laughing, but don’t see the security personnel laughing.

“Would that set this off?” I ask, still chuckling like my Number 1 fan.

“Yes.”

My Wife. (My Image ©2020 F. P. Dorchak)

My Wife. (My Image ©2020 F. P. Dorchak)

“This is the first one of those I’ve gone through since my operation!” I said. I’m enthusiastic. Amazed. Ready for a great time tonight.

Wand swipe UP.

Wand swipe DOWN.

“You’re free to go.”

Yeah, they were NOT onboard.

Can you believe it? I’d actually forgotten about my hip replacement!

MY TOTAL HIP REPLACEMENT!

How funny. Good warm up for the warm-up act, thought I.

Anyway, we make our way into the balcony seats and end up having a great time. Both comedians are great, and they’re also CLEAN. It was quite cool to see young comics not getting all disgusting in their acts. I don’t mind adult humor, but some comics today find it “edgy” to go right into the toilet—and beyond. Anyway, it was a blast.

Brian Regan. Were he IN the shot. (My Image ©2020 F. P. Dorchak)

Brian Regan. Were he IN the shot. (My Image ©2020 F. P. Dorchak)

None of my smartphone shots of the two comedians came out. The only shot that did come out was this one of the two water bottles placed there for Will Fer—I mean Brian. Brian Regan.

Have I mentioned how much it was still snowing outside? Well, it was.

Now, you may be wondering why I have that one smeared picture up above. Well, I don’t like to include family in my blog posts, because I like to keep them out of my issues and keep much of my personal life personal, but when I took some pictures of my wife as we sat waiting for the show to start, I couldn’t help but use that little image above! It shows that I do care enough to include my wife in my blog posts…without actually including her.

I call that edgy.

About fpdorchak

Speculative and paranormal fiction author. Please check out my website: https://www.fpdorchak.com/. Thank you for stopping by!
This entry was posted in Comedy, Fun, Leisure, To Be Human and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to Brian Regan – Stand-up Comic

  1. Karen Lin says:

    Ah yes, I metal. Your attitude proves you also to be a comedian. When you fly won’t you have to take a doc’s note?

  2. adirondackoutlaw.com says:

    Greetings! Haven’t checked in recently. How is the lastest book coming? I’m still busy fathoming some “Dead Dreams”. I’ve been working on my own stuff, as you are aware, seeking Zen, in my boat. haven’t gotten there quite yet, I don’t think. but I did get up to SL Winter Carnival & the Ice Palace. They were awesome, as always.
    2.5 months, my blog says I’m over 45,000 words(I prefer not to rely too much on pitch counts). Some of them good. Probably some- pretty not.
    Okay- just wanted to check in and say “Hi.”
    To end with my all time favorite line
    “And that weren’t no fish!”

    It ain’t htere quite yet- but when I find time- that trophy IS getting mounted on my wall.

    Write well,
    Dick

    • fpdorchak says:

      Hey, Dick! Doing well! Also deep into second-draft territory! Just completed the initial “reverse outline,” which I’ll begin tweaking and correcting and putting into use!

      Glad you’re deep into your own writing! Been catching some of your blogs…will catch some more.

      More later—and keep writing!

  3. Paul says:

    Regan’s a funny guy! Watched his “nunchucks and flamethrowers” special on Netflix recently and really enjoyed it. Certainly didn’t miss the R-rated material we get with a lot of other comics. He and Jim Gaffigan are great.

    • fpdorchak says:

      They are—my wife and I just watched one of Jim Gaffigan’s specials the other night. I never realized he was G-rated. Mind you, I don’t mind a little R-rated, but when the entire bit descends into toilet humor (and beyond, if you can believe me, and yes, it can!), you’ve lost me….

      • Paul says:

        Exactly. I agree, not everything has to be G-rated, but as you say, it can get really bad, and what bothers me more is how few options you have if you want to be spared some toilet humor — and yes, worse. Plenty of comics in the old days were extremely funny without it.

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